


The World Was Made By Gran Gran’s Face

by entity9silvergen



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Drabble Collection, Gen, No Dialogue, No Romance, Reflection, War, loosely follows plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:00:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 8,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27635804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entity9silvergen/pseuds/entity9silvergen
Summary: In the Southern Water Tribe, elders were the heart of family. There is no paper or books to record history, songs, culture, and the knowledge of the world so memory and skill of tongue were everything. Those with the longest memories were guides when it came to traversing the terrain, understanding the paths of prey, and the way of the spirits. Elders were the ones who shaped the worldview of the younger generation. They told the tribe what was and what wasn’t.Or, Zuko grabs Gran Gran and Sokka loses hope for the world.
Relationships: Hakoda & Sokka (Avatar), Momo & Sokka (Avatar), Referenced Sokka/ Yue - Relationship, Sokka & Gran Gran, Sokka & The Gaang (Avatar), Sokka & Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve been having writer’s block so I decided to write a prompted drabble fic (meaning each chapter is less than a thousand words). The prompt was the line “the world was made by grandma’s face.” This fic loosely follows the sequence of events in ATLA but is more focused on reflection than the actual events of the story.

The entire world froze to one moment in time. The ice below his feet was still groaning from the impact of the metal ship. Wind was slapping his face and aggressively blowing everyone’s hair in every direction. The familiar bite of the cool air was nipping the exposed skin of his face. His fingers ached from his iron grip on his trusty boomerang. The midnight sun reflected on the glaciers, blinding anyone who dared stare at it. He could hear his sister’s sharp inhale of breath as her eyes widened in fear. Children’s spears fell awkwardly onto the ground with a clatter. The faint scent of ash filled his nostrils. 

Somehow he was hyper aware of it all yet completely unaware at the same time. He should have been paying attention- by Tui and La, he knew he really, really should have. It was his job to protect the village, afterall. He had to be on guard- but all the noise and sights faded into the background like the ocean hiding the screams of a drowning diver.

Why was the tribe’s only warrior so distracted, you ask?

Because a firebender had his hands on his grandmother.

The foreigner was saying something nonsensical but Sokka couldn’t hear it. He made wild gesticulations but Sokka didn’t see where. He spat sparks but Sokka couldn’t feel them. He could only hear his heart pounding against his ribcage in fear. He could only see the firebender’s hand on Gran Gran’s shoulder. He could only feel his stomach clenching as a thousand possibilities raced through his mind. 

Sokka always had a powerful imagination. Normally it served him well but today karma struck and decided to take it’s payment for all the good ideas he had over the years by plaguing with something worse than his mind had ever conjured. The image of the armored man’s hand bursting into flame echoed through his mind in tune with his sharp, uneven breathes. Gran Gran’s screams filled his ears. The scent of burned flesh scorched his nostrils, making him want to vomit. He was dimly aware that the firebender hadn’t moved but reality and fantasy were too blurred at the moment for him to notice.

What happened when he did? When he moved, would the horrors of his mind become true? He couldn’t stand the thought of his Gran Gran getting hurt. He’d deny it if asked, he was a man and men were meant to be strong, but deep, deep down his soul rang with love and the need to see his blood and kin safe. It was why he trained and fought so hard but it seemed all his efforts did nothing. Here he was standing, parayzed with fear, unable to do anything when it mattered most.

What if he did something worse than hurt her? What if he took her away? He didn’t know what the Fire Nation was capable of but he knew what his tribe was capable of and he knew they were not capable of surviving the rest of the season without her, let alone saving her. And what if these Fire Nation goons were as bad as the ones who raided their village all those years ago? What if they… What if they killed her? The Fire Nation had already stolen two members of their family. If Gran Gran died today, he and Katara would truly be alone.

Sokka’s consciousness started wriggling out of the prison that was his mind but he wasn’t really sure what the firebender was saying yet. Gran Gran was eyeing him with a mixture of fear and horror as well as something else he’d never seen on her worn, leathery face. She always showed emotion in such simple ways but today he couldn’t describe the look etched onto her face. It was so… complex. The muscles under her wrinkled skin were frozen and stiff with panic and her eyes were wide with calm terror, that much was clear, but there was something more. Something that Sokka didn’t understand and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to.

The firebender jerked his arm as he yelled, jostling Gran Gran’s old bones. Sokka wondered if her heart could take this kind of scare. Of course she could, he mentally scolded himself a moment later. She was Gran Gran, she could survive anything. It didn’t mean Sokka wasn’t terrified though. Of the firebender and that look on her face he couldn’t read. He wanted them to go away but he was still frozen, unable to do anything to change the awful situation the tribe was in.

And then Aang swooped in and announced that he was the Avatar. Hope flashed on Katara’s face but it was too late for Sokka.

The scene burned into Sokka’s memory forever. That petrified expression on Gran Gran’s face was all he needed to know about the Fire Nation, the war, and the world.


	2. Momo's Eyes

Sokka didn’t expect to find someone with Gran Gran’s eyes so far from home.

Granted, they were just at the Southern Air Temple so it wasn’t  _ that _ far but it was still farther from home than he'd ever been. He didn’t expect to find anyone here at all but here he was, someone whose gaze rang with a feeling so familiar yet so foreign.

He didn’t expect to find so much comfort in a lemur.

Momo was nothing like Gran Gran. He was an animal, first of all. He couldn’t speak. Well, he could in his own way but that way was nothing like the way Gran Gran did. And where Gran Gran was strong and passionate, Momo was… not. He was small and cuddly and went as limp as a piece of wet seaweed noodle when he was warm. But they had the same eyes.

Well, no. Again, not really. Momo’s eyes were huge and green and Gran Gran’s eyes were so tiny that Sokka had really no idea what color they were. But they shared the same brokenness. 

Sokka thought Momo’s eyes were lonely. The poor guy probably was. He couldn’t imagine what the lemur had seen. He was the last of his kind and the only living thing in all of the Southern Air Temple. Was he here when the Fire Nation attacked? Was he the descendant of the survivors? Had some terrible demise fallen upon his kin that only he survived? He was scared, terrified even, when they met but he warmed up to the group so quickly. It was obvious that he craved attention, companionship, and the warm touch of another. 

Gran Gran’s face had the same kind of pain. She’d lost something, just like Momo, and she carried that pain in her bones and kept walking forward even though it ached constantly. Some things provided solace but it never fully faded.

Was this how Gran Gran looked when she was young? What happened in her youth to hurt her so deeply?

Even though Aang was the first to befriend him, Momo spent most nights curled up by Sokka and that was a comfort. He was always there, just like Gran Gran. And every morning, he’d wake up full of life and snuggle against Sokka’s parka before demanding food. Sokka was always happy to give it to him. 

Slowly, the echoes of loneliness and grief began leaving his face. Momo was always affectionate but he became more relaxed around them. One day it was like he’d just forgotten his whole past. Happiness replaced anguish.

It was the day that the winged lemur had gotten stuck in a hog monkey trap that Sokka noticed this. His tiny form had trembled in terror, eyes as wide as the peaches he was named after, but his gaze was so trustful. Sokka’s cold heart swelled when he realized all that faith was for him.

There were no trees in the South and muscles Sokka was unused to using strained as he climbed. Dusty bark scraped the surfaces of his hands but he ignored it, mind fixed on blimbing up to reach his little friend. If he could do something to eliminate just a bit of the negativity that plagued the world around him.

Momo’s voice chattered excitedly when Sokka reached the branch he was suspended from. He watched through the metal bars of his round prison, face lighting up in the same way it did when Aang offered him lychee nuts at the sight of the boy climbing toward him. He turned to the hog monkeys and spoke to them in the language only animals knew and waved a paw excitedly in Sokka’s direction. His tone was bright and almost proud. Sokka was sure he was imagining it but the hog monkeys stopped moaning and wailing in distress and fell silent, their expressions shifting to match that of the imprisoned lemur’s.

Sokka sighed and joked like it was a chore but privately, he smiled. It made him feel warm in a way he hadn’t felt in a long time. He shuffled along the branch and drew his boomerang, using the sharp edge to cut the rope suspending the trap. Momo’s cage fell and the lemur burst out, free once again.

The lemur quickly clambered back up to Sokka and prompted him to free his fellow prisoners. Sokka rubbed his head before flicking his wrist, sending his boomerang through the air, and the hog monkeys were free within moments.

The beasts hit the ground and leaped from their metal confines. They embraced each other excitedly before looking up at their savior and hooting their gratitude. Sokka smiled back and leaned against the tree trunk as he watched the pair run away.

Momo coiled around his shoulders and chirped happily before finding his way to Sokka’s lap. When Sokka’s eyes met his, he saw no traces of the fear that seized it mere minutes ago. The little lemur gazed up at Sokka like he’d put the stars in the sky. In his mind, he may as well have. Momo’s faith in his human friends warded off any fear of the world that had hurt him. He felt safe knowing he was under Sokka’s protection and that changed the way the world looked in his eyes.

Sokka didn’t think anything could make the anguish fixed on Gran Gran’s features fade but he’d helped Momo forget his pain and that gave him hope that maybe one day he’d be able to say the same for his Gran Gran.


	3. Siege of the North

When Sokka met Pakku, his view of the world became just a bit clearer.

Gran Gran had this light to her. There was this happiness buried under layers of ferocity and wisdom. The light wasn’t pure though. Something in her, some deep part of her spirit, was broken and that reflected on the way her laughter never quite hit the same note as a careless child’s and the way her smile was more akin to Hakoda’s than Kya’s even though she didn’t know the same burdens as a man. There was pain behind her face every time she looked at one of her tribemates or out onto the horizon.

Now Sokka knew it was because the world had tainted her.

He’d traveled through the Earth Kingdom and it was… awful. And bizarre. They ate strange foods and hunted strange animals on dirt instead of ice. Money and trade were valued over all, even family. Men were greedy and selfish. They only thought of themselves, even those who were sworn to protect. So many earthbenders turned their powers against their own people.

Sokka had been relieved to arrive in the Northern Water Tribe. Ice, frozen water, seals, fish- It was all so familiar. Even if their buildings stood taller, even if they had waterbenders to heal and assist the hunt, it was so much like home. For a moment, he couldn’t believe why Gran Gran ever left it.

Then he meant Pakku and he understood. This place, it was unfair. He’d admit that he’d spent most of his life not drinking his respect women juice like he should but even he thought such rigid oppression was ridiculous. Before today, it was unfathomable. Katara, her bending was a part of her and water was an extension of who she was. To be denied the chance to learn to live to her fullest potential… it was just wrong. How many female waterbenders here experienced the same thing? Did they gaze out in the ocean and pull at the tide in longing the same way Sokka had seen Katara do so many times? Gran Gran wasn’t a bender but Sokka couldn’t help but fear that Pakku held her back in the same way. Sokka would throw himself in the horrendous pit that was the Earth Kingdom in hopes he’d one day arrive in the Southern Water Tribe a dozen times if it meant escape from life in the Northern Water Tribe.

But it got worse. The Fire Nation attacked again. Snowflakes turned to ash, those beautiful buildings came crashing down, the moon turned as red as blood, benders were stripped of their bending, the ocean raged… It filled Sokka with a fear that struck him down to the bone. He didn’t want to see another’s home destroyed, even if that home was wrong. He didn’t want to see the panic in the eyes of the benders as their element abandoned them to the firebenders burning everything in sight. He didn’t want to see the ocean who’d always been such a calm, kind ally in so much pain.

He didn’t want to see Yue die.

What they had… It was fleeting and brief yet so deep. She was a nonbender, like him, but he felt a bond with her as powerful and serene as the tug of the ocean. She was beautiful and shined with brilliance but Sokka felt blind around her. It didn’t matter what she looked like. He was young and he’d never really understood what it meant to love someone for their soul but he understood now. Who she was at heart, that was what mattered. When he was around her, it felt like everything was going to be okay.

When she passed, it felt like his heart was torn out by a sea vulture.

She was still watching over him, he knew. At night, it was never really dark. The moonbeams hummed with her love when they washed over his skin and illuminated the world around him. He’d never truly be alone, not as long as the moon sat in the sky, but something wonderful had been torn from him. It hurt more knowing she was there and just out of reach than if she’d left him forever. He didn’t think he could ever fully overcome his loss.

Gran Gran was old. Sokka was only fifteen and he’d only left home a few weeks ago. And he’d traveled by sky bison. Gran Gran had traveled by boat. Maybe even by foot. How much had she seen on her journey? She must have traveled so far and for so long. How much had she lost? Had she met anyone like Yue on her journey? She’d left Pakku and lost Sokka’s grandfather… Neither of them had turned into the moon. Her ties to her husband were severed in every way but Pakku was still very much alive. Did she think about him? Did she wonder if he was alive? Which loss hurt more? It didn’t really matter. She’d lost love and now Sokka knew what that was like.

If Gran Gran knew the same pain he now knew, he understood why she always hid it with watery smiles.


	4. Father of Mine

When Sokka saw his father again, he was happy beyond belief but he couldn’t share what he’d learned in their time apart. It wasn’t that he wouldn’t, though if given the chance he doubted he’d take it. His father had a mere glimpse of what his life had become and Sokka didn’t think he needed to know more. The South was a tiny, tiny safe haven from the rest of the world and Hakoda was the beacon of that world. His light was even more tainted than Gran Gran’s and Sokka didn’t want to make it any dimmer. For now, he just wanted to relish in its remains and enjoy his time with his father while he still could.

He couldn’t though. Not really. Unlike the time he’d spent with Bato, there was no storytelling, Water Tribe cuisine, or illusions of peace telling them to sit in a willfully ignorant bliss. There was barely time for it to truly sink in that he was reunited with his father before he had to leave again.

Half a day. Not even that and he was torn away from his father again. He wanted to protest. He wanted to fight and scream and just finished the day with his father but he couldn’t. He was a warrior, an adult in his tribe’s eyes. This was the first time he’d seen his father since the day he’d gone rock dodging. He didn’t know when he’d see his father again but he wanted Hakoda to remember the man he’d become until they met again.

And Hakoda… He looked so proud. Pride brimmed a face drenched in devastation. It was a father’s instinct to hold his children close and it was so clear it went against everything inside him to let Sokka go. But, he was the chief and he was fighting for the greater good. He had to let him go. If the spirits smiled upon them, they’d see each other again. There was no guarantee though and that scared them to the bone.

As Sokka flew away on Appa’s back, he wondered if Gran Gran felt the same way as Hakoda did now back when she watched him go off to war three years ago. She’d been saddened and slothful the days following Hakoda’s departure but she lifted her chin and kept her head up for the tribe’s sake. They were relying on her, just as Hakoda’s men were relying on him now and Sokka’s friends relied on him.

How many families had the war broken up? Sokka knew he was just one man. He’d traveled far but even moving as much as he did, he couldn’t escape his pain. How much harder would it be if he stayed in one place? If he wasn’t so focused on saving the world?

Haru’s father was dragged off into a concentration camp just for being a bender. How many others suffered the same fate? Teo’s relationship with his father was strained and nearly broken thanks to the Fire Nation army’s interference. Did the rest of the FIre Nation’s resources come from hurting other families in the same way? The Freedom Fighters had come together through shared loss and now they were scattered and divided. Did they miss each other the way Sokka missed home? Kyoshi Island had been neutral for decades. What pushed them to join the war? There were countless refugees in Ba Sing Se. How much had they lost?

Even his companions, they’d lost something irreplaceable. Aang lost Monk Gyatso, his home, his culture, his people, and his friends. Appa and Momo had lost everything that defined them and their species. Katara had lost the chance to connect with her element the way generations of waterbenders had before her. Toph… Sokka wasn’t really sure how the war affected her before she joined them. Her family’s business thrived on the war and that divided their family in ways Sokka really couldn’t understand. And now Toph was running away, willing to put her life in danger, just to have the freedom to be herself.

And Sokka… Sokka, he’d lost Yue. He had no mother and for a few years, no father. Responsibility had been thrust upon him too young and he never really had the chance to grow up. He’d lost the chance to have a normal childhood. He hadn’t gone penguin sledding in years. He really only felt comfortable complaining about the hunger that his growing body forced upon him once they’d left their home and there weren’t women and children who needed that food more. He’d been put in the role of a guardian too soon and Sokka didn’t think he’d ever be able to have a child of his own without the fear he’d have to send his kid into battle like those toddlers the day Zuko attacked.

Zuko… He didn’t want to think about him right now but he couldn’t help it. Zuko, Azula, Iroh… They were Fire Nation royalty. Their lineage was responsible for the war and all the suffering placed upon the world. But Zuko and Iroh weren’t anything like Azula. They’d been banished, right? The world had hurt them as well. In their own way but it’d hurt them nonetheless.

Sokka didn’t think the world could hurt a firebender but Jeong Jeong, Shyu, and Chey... They were good firebenders. They’d suffered from the war and Sokka's seen it firsthand. Maybe it wasn’t so unbelievable that Zuko and Iroh were affected in a similar way.

For so long, Zuko had been the face of the Fire Nation in his mind. But his face was burned. Maybe that was symbolic. He’d always thought every firebender and Fire Nation citizen was evil but in the end, they were just people. Farmers, merchants, beggars, metal workers, field hands… If Zuko could be hurt, they could too. Maybe they wanted the war to end as much as he did.

Maybe everyone in the world had a face like Gran Gran.


	5. Fire Nation Ship

Those weeks on the Fire Nation ship were awful.

There was blood on the decks. Men burned themselves learning to use the unfamiliar furnaces. Warriors sharpened their weapons instead of gathering food. This, this truly was war.

Sokka knew that. He always had. He’d grown up in war. His parents had grown up in war. Gran Gran had grown up in war. War was the world and the world was war. But he’d always been disconnected from it. In the South, his life had only been touched by war a handful of times. And traveling through the Earth Kingdom, he’d been moving too fast to feel it’s deepest effects. He saw surface wounds, never the damage beneath.

He was certainly seeing it now. Everyone on this ship had been worn to the bone. They were tired and drained and they just kept fighting. It was all they knew at this point. The only option. Sokka didn’t want to see it.

He busied himself by throwing himself into his work. He caught up with his father. He shared stories with his tribemates for the first time as one of them. He helped Toph around the ship. He helped Teo touch up his wheelchair. He played with Momo. He helped Katara feed the troops. He made armor for Appa. It wasn’t enough though. 

War had tainted everything.

Sokka and his father danced around mentioning what separated them for so long. There were only so many stories the tribe could tell that weren’t about the war. He felt guilty about being the one making Toph be on the water in the first place. Knowledge that almost all technological advancements had been used to push the war effort lingered in his subconscious when he swapped ideas with Teo. The way Momo searched the horizon for trees made him think about how many others had been displaced from their homes. Spending time with Katara didn’t feel the same now that they were on a ship instead of in an igloo. Appa…

Appa was sad. He wasn’t averse to fighting in the same way the Air Nomads were but he still didn’t like fighting. And he certainly didn’t like the idea of going into battle not knowing if Aang would be there or not.

Aang was still unconscious. A lightning strike straight to the back. He should have died. He  _ did  _ die and he would still be dead if not for Katara and her spirit water. Aang was alive and he was there but not quite with them. The air lacked the spark of energy he always brought to it.

Sokka knew he couldn’t blame himself. He wasn’t a bender but he still pulled his own weight in the fight. No, that wasn’t it. The self-deprecating feelings he had, they came from his thoughts and not his actions. His thoughts alone were responsible for the weight he felt pulling him down.

He’d felt pity for Zuko. If his face was the Fire Nation and the Fire Nation had been hurt by the war like he had, maybe they weren’t evil. But Zuko had proved him wrong when he and his sister stuck Aang down. He was responsible for Aang’s unconsciousness, Katara’s loss of hope, and so much more.

Still, he couldn’t hate him.

Zuko’s grandfather was… Fire Lord Azulon, right? Son of Sozin, the man who started the war. Sokka liked to think he was a strong individual but he knew it was Gran Gran who shaped him into the man he became. She did so much more than feed and cloth him. She taught him his morals and values. The need to protect her and make her proud pushed him out of bed and to the training grounds every morning. She was always there for him, provided distance allowed. And when she couldn’t be there in person, she was present in his heart. She gave him the strength he needed to keep taking the breaths he needed to survive the day.

What if it was Azulon’s face he saw when he looked inward? Or Sozin’s? Worse, Ozai. Ozai wasn’t a figure of the past. He was a very real person and a very real person in Zuko’s life. And Azula’s, Sokka supposed. How could he hate them knowing all the evil in their blood came from their predecessors? They never really had the opportunity to shovel their own path in the snow.

What if Gran Gran’s face was angry and hateful instead of firm and kind? Would Sokka be the same man he was today, fighting for the same cause? He didn’t know and that scared him.


	6. Day of the Black Sun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve never experienced a total eclipse. I’ve experienced a near full eclipse but it was probably around 3 or 4 years ago so I don’t remember what it was like. The past couple years we did come pretty close to losing the sun during fire season. Eclipses and wildfire smoke are somewhat similar and my experiences with both of them have kind of mixed together in my memory so this description of the eclipse isn’t completely accurate. Just roll with it.
> 
> Also I have finished writing this story so expect faster updates.

The world changed when the sun disappeared. It was… Sokka didn’t know how to describe it.

It wasn’t like the polar night. The polar night was a deep, deep black that covered the world like a cool, calm blanket. Right now, Sokka was still very, very aware of the sun. If he wanted to, he could look up and it would still be there. He didn’t look up, of course, he wasn’t an idiot, but he knew the sun was still as present as it has ever been. 

It wasn’t like a storm either. Clouds blocked the sun and cast shadows onto the world below. This was nothing like that. There was no dampness in the air or suspenseful silence. The air was still as dry as the rest of the Fire Nation and the sound of battle still roared around him.

If he had to compare it to anything, he would compare it to the day the moon died. Nothing about the situation was the same. Then it had been night and now it was day. Then the Fire Nation had been attacking and now the Fire Nation was being attacked. Then they’d been fighting on the freezing water and now they were fighting on the dry land. But still, it was the same.

The sun was still there. It just looked different, like there was a shadow over it. The moon had remained in the sky as well, stained red with spilled blood but still looming overhead. Both were constants in the world, enormous masses in the sky that dictated the lives on the Earth below. Mankind needed them both to survive but this time the sun would only be gone for a few minutes. Sokka could survive without it until it came back.

The firebenders were connected to Angi in the same way waterbenders were connected to Tui. As a nonbender, Sokka experienced both losses in a similar way, he supposed, but he knew it was nothing like what a bender felt. Did these firebenders feel the same way as those waterbenders that night? He remembered their faces, their voices, so horrified that they were suddenly barren of their element. Did these men and women feel that same terror right now?

Sokka searched his enemies’ faces. He felt guilty about the trickle of glee bubbling up in his belly at the prospect of his long time foes feeling the same pain his people but that idea was soon lost. Something wasn’t right here. No one was even trying to bend. Everyone here was- Oh no.

He was fighting nonbenders. He looked around quickly, seeing that his allies were fighting warriors with spears and dodging arrows. There wasn’t a firebender in sight.

The realization set in like the rising tide and any illusion of victory he had shattered. The Fire Nation knew they were coming. They had prepared. They were holding their firebenders in reserve, letting the nonbenders batter them until the sun came back. Maybe Aang had a chance of defeating the Fire L- No. No, there wasn’t any hope left.

The rest of the battle was a blur. He fought and he fought hard but now he was fighting to get his men out alive, not to give them a better future. There was a lot of yelling. He was pretty sure his voice was among those barking orders but his mouth was moving on its own. His body was just moving on it’s own, fighting to keep going even when his mind and heart had given up.

When he came back to his senses, he was holding The Duke. He wasn’t totally sure how he got him. Pipsqueak was giving him the most sorrowful look and Sokka had no idea what he expected him to be doing with the younger boy.

Haru- thank the spirits for Haru- clapped Sokka’s shoulder, snapping him out of his daze. He scooped The Duke out of his arms, dropped him on Teo’s lap, and began waving for Sokka to get onto the other side of the wheelchair. Sokka shook himself and abruptly realized what he wanted him to do.

Together, the two of them heaved Teo and his chair onto Appa’s back. Strong hands stabilized it before yanking Haru and Sokka up after them. Sokka wasn’t totally sure who was doing the pulling, it felt like there were more hands than people, but all seven kids were haphazardly thrown onto Appa’s back in a mess of limbs in mere seconds.

Sokka tried sitting up but Haru’s leg was pinned against his hip and his arm was trapped under a wheel. The Duke, however, was up in an instant and rushed forward like he was going to lunge off Appa’s back but Sokka reached out reflexively and grabbed him with his free hand before he could reach the end of the saddle. He pulled him close and held onto him, not really knowing why but his pounding heart was telling him it was the right move. 

Sokka felt something damp on his shoulder before seeing the tears in The Duke’s eyes. Following his gaze, he spotted the men on the ground, hands up in surrender. Among them was Pipsqueak and Sokka’s father. Heads bowed in defeat, their eyes flickered upward to watch the bison escaping with their children.

The sheer sorrow on their faces broke Sokka’s heart. Their eyes were shining with apology. Hakoda, Pipsqueak, the Mechanist, Haru’s dad- No, Sokka wanted to scream. It wasn’t their fault. They did everything they could to protect them and keep happiness in their hearts but some things were out of their control. They had nothing to apologize for. He didn’t fault them for their guilt though.

He felt that feeling anytime he looked at his Gran Gran’s face.


	7. Western Air Temple

Life at the Western Air Temple was… strange to say the least.

The first few days were numb. Everyone was shocked and hurting. Thankfully no one in the group was really injured but after weeks preparing for battle alongside their friends and family, being suddenly alone in a strange place with no plan was jarring. Everything felt lonely and Sokka wasn’t really sure how to fill that void. Haru and Teo had taken to exploring the temple but he was pretty sure they were just doing it to keep The Duke from bothering Katara. The waterbender had focused her efforts on feeding the group which was useful but she took it to a length unnecessary enough that Sokka was a bit worried for her. Toph kind of seemed to be appreciating the temple but she always found odd ways to escape being bored so Sokka didn’t think that meant much.

At least Aang seemed to enjoy it. He seemed so happy the first few days at the temple. Sokka didn’t really get it and at first he felt offended that he could be so joyful when everyone else was hurting so much but eventually he understood. Airbenders were nomads and monks. They didn’t have the same attachments as other cultures. Aang hadn’t left anything behind but he’d found something that reminded him of his people and that made him happy so Sokka really couldn’t be that upset.

At first Momo and Appa were the only ones who’d go along with Aang’s antics but slowly life was roused back into the group and the gang joined Aang in old airbender games or would look around for some local plant that made some fantastic tea. Eventually, Teo and Haru stopped wandering off with the Duke, Katara stopped fixating on feeding the group, and Toph stopped kicking random walls around the temple. Sokka almost felt like he could relax.

Everything felt so domestic. He’d never lived a domestic life with Aang or Toph and he didn’t know Haru, Teo, or The Duke that well but war had brought them closer together and it felt like he’d lived with them for his whole life. They just slipped into a routine. They’d do chores, joke around, share meals, train, sleep, and do pretty much everything together. Things started to feel normal again.

But things weren’t normal and they never could be. This wasn’t the South Pole and Sokka felt guilty that he let himself just get swept into this new, peaceful life. Things were easy in a way they never had been back home and he knew he should enjoy it but there was always that nagging feeling that things weren’t the same. His diet had more plants than meat, his shelter was made of stone instead of ice, he was surrounded by people his age… Things were good but he couldn’t let himself get used to this.

Did Gran Gran feel this way when she arrived at the South Pole? In a way, her life paralleled Sokka’s. His South was her North and her South was his Western Air Temple, each journey broken by a long journey in the Earth Kingdom. She’d escaped a harsh, oppressive life and found solace in the South where she had the freedom to be her own woman. Life was hard in the South for Sokka but he wouldn’t say he was oppressed. Far from it. Still, out here, he felt truly free. He didn’t have to fight for every scrap of food, he could sleep outside and he wouldn’t shiver at night, he was on his way to becoming a master swordsman, and he had friends he could be himself with.

Sokka laughed a lot more. And his smile was a bit wider. It felt like a weight had been lifted from his body and the tension was slowly leaving his body, letting him evolve into this lighter, freer version of himself. Had Gran Gran flourished like this when she arrived in the South Pole? They’d both escaped something, Gran Gran societal repression and Sokka responsibility handed to him too young. Both forced them to be something they weren’t and grow up too fast but both of them had found a place where they had the chance to slow down and enjoy life.

Sokka hated to think what Gran Gran’s face used to look like. Sokka used to scowl and moan all the time. In the North, was Gran Gran’s young face wrinkled with exhaustion and anger? Did it all drain away during her journey through the Earth Kingdom like Sokka’s had? Or did she only have the chance to rediscover herself when she arrived in the South Pole?

Sokka didn’t know but he hoped his Gran Gran would recognize his face when he came home.


	8. Boiling Rock

Sokka wasn’t really sure what he felt about Zuko showing up. He still had so many conflicting feelings over him but Aang had accepted him and Zuko had the rainbow flames to prove it. Those things were pretty cool. Maybe that was part of the reason Sokka agreed to go with him on that war balloon to one of the most dangerous places a pair of fugitives could go.

But it was worth it, of course. He’d found Suki and his father which is more than he could’ve hoped for. It was hard, sure, getting them out. It was terrifying pretty much the whole time and there were a few times where he thought he was going to die but the chaos had died down and now they were just a bunch of criminals in a war ship.

At the moment, Zuko, Chit Sang, and Hakoda were trying to combine their knowledge on ships and Fire Nation machinery enough to safely pilot the airship. Suki and Sokka were sitting in the back, trying to get some rest. Sokka sat beside the warrior, getting comfortable quickly, but soon realized she wasn’t relaxed in the slightest. Her muscles were tense as a fishing line and her body was as stiff as a board. He wanted to ask her about it. What had happened to her? What did she see? Could he help? But he didn’t speak up. He never did.

Everyone on this ship had gone through so much. Suki had left her home and got thrown in the Boiling Rock. Chit Sang had been in there even longer. His dad… Sokka couldn’t imagine what he’d gone through. And Zuko, banished and burned, was a whole ‘nother story.

It made Sokka feel very alone.

Sure, he’d gone through shit himself but it just felt incomparable compared to the others. Like he didn’t deserve to be here which was stupid. He tried to shake the thoughts away and focus on the here and now. They were home free but they wouldn’t really be safe until they reached the Western Air Temple. Even there, they weren’t truly safe. They wouldn’t be safe anywhere but Sokka longed to reunite with his friends and sister.

It was a joyous occasion when they got back. Katara, understandably, was pissed they left for so long without warning but got over it quickly at the sight of her father. Toph thought it was awesome and demanded every detail out of Zuko before deciding Chit Sang was her new favorite person ever. Aang and the Duke were just happy to see everyone. Teo was interested in the war ship. It just felt so normal. It was nice.

Sokka wished his mother was here.

Would he always feel incomplete without her?

Then Suki’s arm was around him and everything felt okay again.

He hoped one day he could make her feel the same way.

Everyone smiled and laughed but was that all superficial? Wasn’t everyone just as broken inside as the people around them? Walking down the street, a man resting on a bench was hurting inside. Maybe he was lonely, his friends and lovers stolen from him by the war. In a store, the woman behind the counter was hiding behind a friendly face. Maybe she felt lost, her identity stripped from her by the instability of the world. On the playground, those children were putting on tough faces. Maybe they were afraid of the world they were growing up in.

The Avatar was supposed to be the arm around their shoulders. He was their hope, their support. He made them believe the future would be brighter. He gave them the will to move forward and keep their chins up. But even though it was Aang’s job, Sokka wanted to help in the same way. Even if he could never hope to impact people as much as Aang could, he knew every person counted and he could do  _ something _ . Aang couldn’t reach everyone. Sokka would be there for whoever he couldn’t reach.

Who needed it most? Suki? He didn’t know how to help her. Zuko? He was trying. Gran Gran? Gran Gran…Gran Gran’s face was the prime example of hiding pain behind superficial happiness but she still kept moving forward. She had for so long. Even when she lost Kya and Hakoda went off to war… Were Katara and Sokka the arms around her that told her everything was going to be okay? But they’d left…

Sokka longed to be home. The moment this war ended, he was rushing to the South Pole to throw his arms around his Gran Gran.


	9. Sozin's Comet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the only chapter that was rewritten. The original version was kind of a poem and I didn’t think it really fit so I posted it on my FFN account and rewrote this chapter. If you want to read the old version, check it out over there. I have the same username.

The sky was stained red.

Bloody, bloody red.

If he really looked at it, it was gorgeous in a twisted way. Or maybe not even twisted. Maybe it was only twisted because he understood it. If he were a child, someone far younger and far more innocent, he’d think it was pretty with all the red clouds, the nip of smoke, and the blurry skies. But he knew what was happening and the idea of enjoying it made him sick.

He was glad Toph couldn’t see the world that surrounded him as he held onto her, arms screaming, from their place on edge of the airship. Was that cruel? Being grateful she couldn’t see? He was terrified knowing that he was the only thing she could “see” right now with her feet off the ground and all. How would she feel if she knew they were dangling over a death drop? Knowing that the only thing keeping her from falling into emptiness was Sokka’s skinny little arms?

His whole body hurt. From the fighting and the injuries to holding up two people’s body weight on his fingertips- It was just too much. He could let go right now and it would all be over. Maybe he could hoist Toph up. He would fall if he tried but he sure as hell wasn’t dropping Toph to pull himself up on his own. It was scary knowing how much she trusted him in this very moment.

His blood was roaring in his ears and his heart was thundering against his ribcage. His mind was a blur. It was racing yet he was thinking about nothing at all. He wasn’t thinking about the war or home or what would happen after this. He was just thinking about how this moment seemed to stretch forever. If he survived this, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to forget it. 

Some dark part of his mind told him he deserved this but he didn’t understand why. This pain and anguish and fear was just payment for his role in this war and what he’d done which didn’t really make sense. He was on the right side, right? Even the enemy didn’t deserve this kind of physical and emotional hurt. Except maybe Ozai. Maybe that was why he was here, for wishing pain upon another. 

That didn’t really make sense. Maybe he was bargaining? Trying to find his place in this crazy, upside down world as he faced his final moments. It was funny, he’d always heard your life would flash before your eyes when you were staring death in the face but Sokka didn’t feel like that at all. He just felt oddly alone, which was weird because Toph was right there.

In truth, he’d never felt more alive. He didn’t really want the feeling to fade into nothingness. He thinks he might be okay if it did though. He was pretty sure he was going to die and he didn’t have much to say about it. He was just so tired of fighting.

Then a calloused hand was wrapped around his wrist and he was being pulled up. He wasn’t even fully aware of what was happening but his body was moving on his own and he was pulling Toph back up to the airship. He was confused and disoriented but he felt safe when he really shouldn’t. He was sitting and there was someone holding him and Toph was there and she was safe and he just- he just-

He felt so full of love and gratitude. And those feelings were radiating off the people around him. He felt so alive in this moment, so much more than he had before. How could he be okay with missing this? Had he really been prepared to die knowing life was so beautiful?

Toph was wiping her snot and tears on his tunic. She was practically on his lap, careful to avoid crushing his leg. Suki was behind him, muttering thank yous and expressions of affection. On the horizon, blazing red and brilliant blue clashed until blue consumed the other. He wasn’t really sure what was happening but he knew after that everything was going to be okay.

The dazed expression on his face was replaced with a grin and he pulled Suki and Toph close. Suki laughed and planted a kiss on his cheek. Toph cheered and nearly boxed him in the nose. Sokka didn’t even care. Everything felt okay and for once in his life, he was hopeful it was going to stay that way.

He’d later realize Gran Gran was one of the farthest things from his mind but he couldn’t wait to see her when she heard the good news.


	10. Return

Sokka didn’t know what to think when the war ended. War was all he knew. It was normal as breathing. What was he supposed to do now that it was over? What did it mean?

It seemed the rest of the world seemed to think the same thing. Everything was thrown into chaos the moment Zuko signed those papers that officially ended the fighting. Maybe even before that. War prisoners to release, soldiers to return home, messenger hawks to send out, warriors to heal, friends to check on… That was just skimming the surface. Anxiety flooded Sokka’s body at the thought of how much they still had to do.

Katara told him to stop thinking about it. He was injured, there wasn’t anything he could do at the moment. He argued, of course. He always argued. His body needed to recover but his mind was fine. He could still think. He could still plan. He was the plan guy after all.

Katara said his mind needed to heal too. He didn’t really understand that but he could see how serious he was so he shut his mouth and silently wondered what she meant. He wasn’t like those soldiers and warriors who spent their entire lives fighting in the war. He hadn’t seen horrible things no one should be able to walk away from and just kept living his life. He didn’t know what it was like to have the war rooted so deeply in every fiber of his being. No, he was just a teenager. A kid. A kid in a messed up world but he was still a kid. Right?

It took him longer than it should have to remember he was a warrior in his tribe’s eyes. If he was speaking aloud, he’d be embarrassed but when he was all alone, he’d admit that he didn’t feel much like a warrior. He felt like a kid who was forced to grow up too fast. Maybe that’s what Katara meant. The war had shaken his life hard but now he was riding the aftershocks. It was time for something to change.

They returned to the Southern Water Tribe within a few weeks and everything almost felt normal. They rode on Appa to catch up with the warriors who sailed ahead prior. Katara practically sprinted into the village, the tribesmen who remained behind trickling out of their homes to see what the commotion was. Aang looked as happy as could be skipping after her.

Sokka fell the moment he stepped onto the ice.

At first he thought it was just Momo throwing off his balance from his place snuggled up in his parka but Hakoda’s worried glances at his leg made him realize that wasn’t it. The cold bit at his bones, making him shiver and his body ache, and Sokka realized things would never be the same.

Still, he pushed onward. The village looked just as he remembered it. There was still a bit of damage from Zuko’s attack and Sokka felt a trickle of guilt that he wasn’t there to help with repairs. He tried to shake the feeling away with logical thoughts but it was no use. He reasoned that it wasn’t a bad thing to want to help his people and promised himself he’d do his best to make up for it now. He smiled inwardly at the thought and took it as a sign of his growth.

He wished his mother was there. He almost expected to see her among the faces of his tribe’s women as they gathered at the center of the village. Gran Gran was there though. He broke into a smile at the sight of her and hurried over as fast as his leg would allow to draw her up in his best attempt at the greatest hug she’d ever received.

When he finally pulled away, he realized she was smiling in a way he’d never seen her smile before. It was so… genuine. There was no pain leaking out from behind it. No sadness, no secrets, no tragedy. Just Gran Gran and her happiness. And for the first time, Sokka felt like he understood.

Throughout his journey, he felt like he’d understood her more and more. He knew her past, he knew her pain. He understood the world that had broken her. But right here and now, he felt like he understood her better than ever and that understanding didn’t come from mutual brokenness. No, something beautiful had grown from the cracks of a broken world. 

The relief, the gratitude, the peace, the tranquility, the hope, countless emotions he couldn’t dream of putting into words- He recognized all of them. He had felt all of them. When Suki pulled him and Toph to safety on that warship, when the war ended, when he’d finally returned home, and so many other times, he knew those feelings.

He wondered if his own grandkids or Katara’s grandkids would look at his face with the mystery and curiosity in their gazes that he always did when looking up with Gran Gran. He hoped so. There was such a long story to tell and nothing told it better than Gran Gran’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaand we're done!
> 
> This story was fun to write. I don't really like drabbles but I was having some writer's block and I gotta say short stories help unclog it. If you enjoyed, please leave a comment and check out my other fics!


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